My fight arrives on time and is full but 2 seats, one of which is between me and an older Aussie guy. A few more minute wait and score me! One of the vacant seats is the one between us. This gives me great opening for conversation with the Aussie guy.
Over the next 10 minutes we talk about his travels to Canada back in the 1970’s He had some cool stories and knew the road I lived on. I showed him a few pictures of my old house and he tells me, there wasn’t very many houses on the road back then. Small world though!
My luck got even better. Just before we take off, the older Aussie guy got promoted to 1st class. I now have all 3 seats to myself. The extra room makes the 4 hour flight just fly bye! We even landed 30 minutes earlier than expected. Life is great!
With such an uneventful fast flight, I had a bad feeling customs might not be as easy. As I am walking up to the lines, I see we are being separated by people with electronic chips in their passports and the people who don’t. Mine doesn’t have a chip and that line has 2 people in it. Score me again! I go directly to the customs lady.
Within seconds of her taking my passports, she pulls me aside, where there are two other guards. My first thought is, here we go, life was too easy.
I ask her if there is an issue I can help with, and she promptly tells me to wait.
Another minute goes by and the two security guards are smiling at me. This either means they are happy to get a chance to see in my anal cavity, or they are laughing at her. Please do not be number 1.
She then gives me my passport back and wishes me a nice day. So again I ask her what was the issue. She then tells me my passport is missing my middle name. I look at it and tell her I am confused, it is right here. She looks confused and says, have a nice day.
I now know, the guards were laughing at her.
I am now through customs, and can see Australia… it is just past the last bag check.
On my form, I declared fresh fruit, as I have a can of fruit with a label that says, “Fresh Fruit”. I know this isn’t what they mean, but I do not want any more issues.
The fresh fruit, bio-hazard check line is empty, and the line with people who declared nothing is full. I am first in line again. Hehehe!
The guard asks what fresh fruit I have and I tell him with a serious smile.
He says, “fresh fruit in can!”
I am through… I am here. I am officially in Australia.
Casey you can’t call border patrol on me it is too late!